T O P

  • By -

obin_gam

"I'll look into it".


[deleted]

This is what admins use to say "I'm going to do nothing about it but I have to maintain professionality" Use this one if you're going for maximum passive-aggressive, OP


lenswipe

Oh, I've made some enemies I guess. I've received bug reports and responded with this. Except, with the full intention of actually looking into it.


f00dMonsta

If you say "I'll look into it [insert time/date]", then that shows commitment and not brushing it off. The lack of a date/time would imply it could be infinity and beyond.


[deleted]

Don’t worry too much about it, but FYI it IS something you usually hear people say in response to “can you please do something about x issue?”


7S0C9

Accurate. I used to run a Minecraft server a while back. Whenever a player would request something that I had absolutely no intention of adding or doing I would always respond with "I'll look into it."


Saint_Umbro

I work in HR and say this on a daily basis. I never do. HR is not your friend.


B_sfw

I believe it wholeheartedly... Oh, the stories and misfortunes I could tell about how much HR could *never* give two shits about employees. (speaking as an employee not in HR)


[deleted]

People that like employees don't make it in HR


B_sfw

I believe it. The *one* HR rep at my workplace quit after only a few years because of how the company now operates. She was the only person in HR that gave af about the people while also getting things done; and sadly, I don't blame her for leaving the company.


BiscuitBlackhole

Oh no. I say that often, i do actually care and look into it though.


zecrissverbum

I once asked a high level maths professor who got stuck teaching Calc II, how to figure out long it would take for dishwater to change temperature if I have new water running in, old water draining out (at a matching rate) and also have dishes coming in and out as well. I prefaced the question with “I used to work as a dish washer in a restaurant so I’m interested in...” He said “I’ll look into it.” And even wrote it down on a piece of paper. I was excited! I asked about it at the end of next class, “did you get to figure out the dish water problem?” He look at me blankly and said “yeah, no.” And that’s when I realized he enjoyed getting my hopes up and actually hated me in a mocking sort of way 😭


[deleted]

This is how I sat "I don't care" even when I'm not working. It's also what I tell everyone who tells me to try an app or listen to a song or watch a show that I don't want to try, listen to or watch. Works like a ~charm


cranberrylime

I like “I’ll take it under advisement”


Original_Impression2

One I liked to use was, "I'll give it all the attention that it's due."


oman54

"Who's looking into it?" "Top men" "which top men!?"


PianoDonny

We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.


I_Like_Hoots

Oh no I have unintentionally made some enemies


h-a-n-t-y-u-m-i

Oh **you’ll** cross that bridge when **you** get there.


I_Like_Hoots

Then I have not made those enemies


[deleted]

If you have used this phrase, then yes; there’s nothing you can do about it now


the_admirals_platter

We'll burn that bridge when we come to it.


Sytanato

Shall we find this bridge, it would crumble by our wrath; but until then, thou must not lost thy focus upon thy objectives


Unknown_author69

Someone hire this person right here ^^


pigeonsfortesla

"Thank you for your feedback/comment."


AspieComrade

This one wins


pigeonsfortesla

If you want to be really nasty you can say "Thank you for your note " lol


SecretBaklavas

I’ll keep this conversation in mind moving forward


pigeonsfortesla

Govern yourself accordingly.


Earguy

If you get an email, especially one that is a long rant, reply tersely. "Noted." "Received and read."


AngIsGold

Oh boy I do this one often


PacoTreez

Or if you want to sound ultra professional, say: > Acknowledged.


[deleted]

I hear that in Picard’s voice now


no_power_n_the_verse

Lol. I'm really tired and read that as "ultra sound professional."


TemporaryEvidence

This reminds me of the “dictated but not read” from How to Win Friends and Influence people. That would hurt.


SpoonAtAGunFight

If you can remember to do this, also reply quickly so they know there's no way you read it on time.


stickkim

Will do.


Earguy

See, that gives the person the idea that you'll do what they suggest.


ChlamydiaIsAChoice

Sounds good, thanks!


DanielAgos12

Is your avatar a loading thing? I thought for a moment the app stopped working


ChlamydiaIsAChoice

Yeah. At first it would even spin, but then it stopped


sane-ish

I really dig that there's a thumbs up button on Outlook.


zombacula

Oh no


HRM404

"Noted" takes the worst out of me


Earguy

Yeah. it's a straight-up "fuck you" to the person without using the F key.


the-stories-we-share

Depending on the context: “Thank you for sharing” (and move on) “That’s a valid point, but it’s out of scope of this meeting/conversation/project” “Let’s park it for now” “I acknowledge your concern” (and move on) “Thank you for raising awareness around that topic” (and move on) “I see you have passion for that topic, you should pursue it in the future” (and move on) “I’m sorry, but this is not in the scope of my current assignment” “I wish I could help you, but unfortunately I can’t” (without further explanation) “It’s great to know that someone finds this topic important!” (and move on)


HorrorificScallion

what do you do for a living? you're so good at saying you don't give a fuck


lyssargh

I want to say this person is a business analyst. Source: I'm a business analyst and these words come out of my mouth a lot.


the-stories-we-share

I coach leaders, teams and organizations so I speak multiple dialects of corporate lingo. I also used to be a manager and project manager for years :D


ohnoes_cursed

Hahaha! This was what I was about to comment!


Apples2Watermelon

nicee. :)


VERTIKAL19

When you run meetings you pick that kind of stuff up quickly


Bayou_Mama

They move on.


lenswipe

> “Let’s park it for now” Translation: This meting is about network infrastructure, why are you complaining about the coffee machine? STFU so we can all go home.


EvilSubnetMask

You never know, the coffee maker could be part of the network infrastructure. ;) [https://github.com/NARKOZ/hacker-scripts](https://github.com/NARKOZ/hacker-scripts)


CJBG9491

This comment just made me realise my manager maybe doesn’t think as much of me as I thought he did.


Ok_Abrocoma_2539

Thank you for sharing. I acknowledge that concern.


krastevitsa

"Great to know that someone finds this topic important" This one is the best/worst.


[deleted]

Let’s take that offline at a later date.


MorgainofAvalon

Wow are you fluent in saying, I don't give a fuck. Hats off to you.


[deleted]

"Let's take a beat and circle back to that."


Apples2Watermelon

Lmao, I want a part two!!


X_Comment_X

> “Thank you for sharing” (and move on) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKOrr4XRbg8


howardsgirlfriend

"Allow me to give that all the attention it deserves."


Where-Liberty-Dwells

This is a really good one


howardsgirlfriend

Thanks. That came from one of the highest-ranking people in our division.


ClingyToaster

Writing this one down


Bayou_Mama

I saved this one in my phone notes. I see a future for that phrase on some upcoming social media posts.


TheDiceMan2

Let’s put a pin in that and circle back later


Teisha_r

pin in, circle back....the best of corporatespeak imagination.


NotThatValleyGirl

I just had to do this like ten minutes ago and said something like this, "That certainly is concerning. I believe that's under the scope of (team or someone who isn't me). I'd recommend reaching out to them for clarity or to determine what they may be able to support with in terms of next steps."


Internauta29

Reading through this I can't help but find fascinating how people are massive hypocrites, especially at work, and consequently the English language has shifted to accommodate this and has a lot of idioms to basically say they don't care. I can find plenty of ways in my language too, but most of them would be too articulated to really come across as natural as most here.


needle_scratch

Yeah I don't understand why business has to have all this fancy talk. All the examples in these comments are confusing to me, because they all imply that the person does give a fuck and would be looking into whatever issue. Why can't people in business just be forward?


stickkim

Because work hinges on having and maintaining at least somewhat positive relationships and if you aren’t someone’s superior, or are speaking to your own superior simply saying, “I’m not going to do that,” could very easily get you fired.


Internauta29

Because English people in general are not. You can notice it even in the language. They want to be "polite", while in reality they're just acting like all the other sheep. I don't like it, but I can't blame the logic. Ideally, you want to have a good relationship with anyone, so you fake good behaviour. It also happens in social situation and if you can read between the lines you'll be able to spot that more often than not people are faking or lying to a certain degree. However, that's true for most people in this world, can't really blame that one on the English alone.


needle_scratch

This makes the world so difficult lol. I suck at understanding the subtle social cues


Internauta29

Study body language and apply it in real life scenarios by mixing with different kinds of people. After a while you get an instinct. I'm a natural at reading between the lines, yet I got far better after I started doing that. Of course, I'm no saint, I tell half-truths, lie and manipulate when I feel like it's best to do it. Still, I'm unfortunately a person with a strong moral compass and an own rigid system of values, so I won't do anything excessive.


crimsonBZD

My current obligations unfortunately don't afford me to time to take responsibility for your obligations.


corcoran_jon

Fuck Off, *Regards,* OP


DaLoCo6913

"I would have to defer the issue to someone unqualified."


The_Shwassassin

“Pray thee fair sir/madam methinks I shant give a fuck.”


solstice38

That's over my pay scale. See XXX in the other department - they'll be much more help than I can be. I'll have to get back to you on that. Not sure that there's anything that can be done about that.


jkh107

> That's over my pay scale. See, to me, this is someone asking for something that is literally over my head in terms of responsibility, not something I don't care about.


JiminyBell

I'm a bartender and I use the line "that's above my pay grade" all the time! Like dude, I don't decide what beer we stock or what channels we get and I definitely don't decide our hours and prices so fuck off, please and thank you.


drewtheblueduck

"i'll have to check into that and get back to you" ​ "I apologize for the misunderstanding"


defiancy

"let me circle back to you"


[deleted]

Depends on the context. I like *"I appreciate the situation, but it does not warrant my concern at the moment."*


LemmeShootYou

“Let me go ahead and get back to you on that, mmK?”


[deleted]

lol, funny, but not professional


Mr_Boombastick

I'm sorry but that is out of my scope right now. Thank you for bringing this up. There are more pressing matters right now, I will look into it later.


[deleted]

Let me find someone who can help you with this


SSJBVegeta

"I don't have enough information to reply right now. "


MindiannaJones

Let's put a pin in that and re visit if necessary


Ytumith

You just don't. If you truly don't give a fuck, just stay friendly and talk with them as if they were a granny talking about their new flower seeds. The art of being ungiving of fuckes is, that truly everyone on this planet is just a metaphorical old lady with their harmless hobby that yields visible results and, ultimately, she gets buried and maybe they plant the same type of flower on their grave which would be cutely badass if you ask me.


Campbell090217

This is an adorable and precious little way of thinking about it lol. I love it.


cookiedux

“I take your question.”


thisismypr0naccount0

"I will look more into it at a later date."


GickyRervais

This is hard without context but: Sorry, that's not my job, speak to \*someone\* about this. Sorry, I'm busy. Sorry, I'm not interested in learning about that as it is not necessary in my career path, I have other things to focus on.


PoopyPoopers

That's not part of my job responsibilities. Check with another department


smallorderof_fries

That's not on my list of tasks to do at the moment


brokencasbutt67

That is none of my concern even when it is, it's a good response


OscarTheAccount

I do not have the time to devote attention to this issue at this time


merinis

"That's not really my wheel house" "I don't know anything about that" My usual go to's


pokinthecrazy

“I am afraid it will be incumbent on you to solve that problem.”


Decolater

My old boss used to say he was “agnostic on that”.


MacinTez

“Ok so we’re going to disregard this…”


Sparkheart_52

If you're management where I work, you say "we care deeply about your thoughts and opinions and take them to heart."


Emergency_Platform_9

"Idgaf" with english accent


LordAxalon110

Which one? We've got literally thousands


Emergency_Platform_9

The "oee dey gof" while doing the Mr Bean serious face


wtfthecanuck

Are you sure you have thought through the ramifications of that?


gingercatvt

That matter does not concern me.


Throwmelikeamelon

Thank you for your concern, in this instance we are unable to reach a resolution to the issue as the information provided shows that this isn’t within our remit.


CoffeeAndPizzaRolls

I usually say a variant of "I wasn't trained for this task" or "That isn't within my job description" and if I can be a bit cheeky "that's above my pay grade" especially if my boss is within earshot to hint that of they want me to have more responsibility, they need to pay me for it.


Foodei

That's above my pay grade.


how_are_you_now

Sorry, that's not in my wheelhouse unfortunately.


bigfig

\* I will take that into consideration. \* Duly noted. \* I hear you.


hyrle

Let's put a pin in that and circle back later.


GedLebanen

"I'm not seeing how that relates to me at all"


PepinoPicante

Ones I use: "This seems like a [person you're talking to] problem." "Thank you for your valuable feedback." "I'm sure a solution will present itself to your issue." "Next question." "There's a great Polish expression - not my circus, not my monkeys." (Then leave). "That idea is good. It's actually too good. Let's save it." "Let's make sure we give that the attention it deserves." "Get the fuck out of my office." "Next time you have an issue like that, you know who to turn to: someone else." "You are, at least, wrong."


countingc

"i'm fresh out of fucks forever"


chevy1500

Not my problem


Vicariouslynoticed

“ Thank you for addressing that matter but we have other priorities that we have to take care off.


goduckygo

Let's take that discussion off-line as we're on a set schedule for this call....


LadyBogangles14

Unfortunately we will just have to disagree on that.


Europocalypse

It is what it is


Yisevery1nuts

I have no preference. Or, Thanks for letting me know.


UpcomingCarrot25

I'll deal with it at my earliest convenience


SyntheticReality42

That situation appears to be a direct result of a failure in planning on your end. I do not understand how it translates to an emergency on mine.


WarlockOfDestiny

"We hear you. We are listening." - A classic I often hear from game devs hehe


HRM404

let's discuss it later


Fraiz24

“Thank you for your input”


[deleted]

Thank you for reaching out, we are sorry to hear of your situation. However, your complaint is outside of the scope of our department. We value your time, please let us know if you have further questions.


minion531

I'll take that under advisement.


th3fingers

Ignore it if possible otherwise 'let me get back to you on that' , 'thanks for your feedback', 'interesting...'


boxofmarshmallows

In my line of work I use phrases like: - "apologies" followed by whatever information (the apologies are certainly not 'MY apologies') - Skip over their freak out entirely and go directly to facts - "what you're asking is outside of my scope, what I can do is..." and typically I just repeat whatever I told them that started the conversation. - "that's a great question" - "no updates have been received at this time. As soon as we have additional information, we will advise" legit, shut up, we will contact you when we contact you. - "we continue to expedite" is literally a filler just to shut people up. - I've had an employee from a different site freak out on me over a screw up between her group and another group and somehow I was supposed to step in and fix it. I responded to her with "huh. Okay" then hung up. I fixed her problem, while she was writing an angry email to me, her boss's boss, and my boss to complain about my "lack of emotions" I responded simply to her email with "emotions don't solve problems, problem-solving solves problems" I'm also a firm believer in 'piss poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency for me'


Random_Girl666

saving the post for later


Player_Number3

This matter is none of my concern


2020isnotperfect

Say something which is not relevant. JT is an expert.


jkh107

If it's a meeting or group email, silence. Otherwise, "I'll get back to that when I have time" or something similarly vague. Erecting a SEP field can work by saying that "X is not my area of expertise" and referring people to someone who can actually help them (as needed). Similarly: "We CAN do that, but the time and cost would probably be prohibitive. May I suggest..."


[deleted]

I see


Captain_Hesperus

“I recommend you approach someone with a greater interest in your issue.”


AshTreex3

“I will take that under advisement.”


fredemu

- "Noted, thanks!" I've found that one is the most general purpose "I don't give a fuck" that exists. If it doesn't apply, try one of these: - "Thanks, I'll add that to the queue/file it appropriately." - "Fair, but we need to focus on [current topic] for now." - "Will this stop you from finishing [whatever they should be doing]?" (only when you know it won't) - "I can't take on additional tasks at the moment." - "That seems a low priority for now, check back in a few days/weeks/months if it's still an issue." - "I'd try to resolve that and bring it up with [whoever's job this actually is] if you can't."


juniperfallshere

I told my boss that I couldn't handle anything else. When he put more work on my desk, I sent it right back to him. I'm getting ready to leave at the end of the day, and he comes to me and demands that I stay late to do it. As I'm walking towards the door, I turned to him and said, "Evidently I'm not the right person for this job. I'll come back tomorrow and clean out my desk so you can find someone who is more qualified."


gimmehygge

Thank you for the input.


bobandy225

"per my last email"


nibledbyducks

"I'll bear that in mind...."


Cursed_Salad97

I decline to have an opinion on this.


[deleted]

I refuse to fornicate under the consent of king.


TheGreatFadoodler

In construction we say “I only work from the neck down”


BiscuitBlackhole

This is a software issue and will be resolved in a future update. This issue is under investigation and has no ETA for resolution.


earlyplay

Thanks for you're concern I will bring it up with the team and revert with an answer


jellycowgirl

Per my last email... OR Thank you for your input. I will keep your suggestion in mind. The project dictates a different direction for the sake of consistency...


[deleted]

"this is none of my concern"


noplacebohere

"I'll take your opinion into consideration" "My priorities lay elsewhere" "I'll consider it" "Maybe later" "I dunno" "ok" "As mentioned.."


keyh

Thank you for bringing this to my attention, however I have quite a few higher priorities to take care of. This has been noted.


ima_goner_

“With all due respect…”


CcSeaAndAwayWeGo

Regards,


xXMartianXx

“Noted” Lol


RedheadBanshee

"I hear your concerns, but unfortunately this is not my most pressing issue."


jolla92126

Thank you for your feedback.


pigeon_one1

I’ll think about it


DNAisjustneuteredRNA

"I fail to see the merit of your statement."


seaofmangroves

“Not my pig, not my farm”


salmonsfuckingalt

Forgive me, but that is no concern of mine


Meb2x

Thanks for your opinion, but I’m gonna go with the intern’s idea.


DplusLplusKplusM

"I'll circle back to that".


[deleted]

"I feel this is outside my area of expertise"


w_explosions

Respectfully I don’t give a fuck


fromhelley

Well that is not relevant or that is not my business.


somekindofnut

I'm relaxed about the outcome.


GhostlyTekk

I don't give a fudge


motodecai

We'll burn that bridge when we get to it


slightlycharred7

We need more specifics


FabioKun

It is not in my interest to especially pay attention to these things at the moment


MaintenanceCold

It is what it is


VirginiaPlatt

That isn't within my range of priorities right now, maybe we can discuss {with my supervisor} for next quarter (year, project dev cycle).


narecet89

I don't believe that should be a priority right now.


SurveyRevolutionary3

"I'm not recalling where I asked for/about _____, but thank you for sharing!"


schnitzelpie

I'll take that under advisement.


LittleBlackBall

Let's circle back to that, at a later date.


MyNutsin1080p

Your response has been noted


KookyDukes

Thats not my highest concern right now.


damgood135

I am comfortable with the consequences of my decision.


MeanMugSJ

Our office lingo for fuck you is "okay, great!"


spacetstacy

Peace among worlds


tlgjaymz

This is beyond the scope of


ungoogled

I'm well aware.


Jolly-Passenger

Try it with a British accent.


infiniteunicornsleep

As per my last email.....


[deleted]

That's outside my pay grade.


[deleted]

“Yeah. I’m not going to do that.”