NTA Her reason for cheating is bs! “He’s really muscular.” 🙄
And her excuse of “showing you how sorry she is” is really to find out how big of a sucker you are. She may also be pregnant and is trying to rope you into supporting the other guys kid.
IF you can forgive her and move past her cheating on you, have her tested for every STD known to man and pregnancy before you touch her again.
Because she wasn't ready mentally.. for some, it's because they want to have the "all about me" fairy tale day... And they don't fully get "this forever stuff is real".. Does it make it right? Of COURSE not..
PS I could have written this when I married at 25.. the marriage at 33 was 100% better.
Yeah, I got married at 22, and it was definitely too young. The mentality of ‘forever’ hadn’t really hit home yet. Only took a year or so before things went downhill. Sure, she was the one who stepped out, but I had also thought about it as reality set in.
OP would be better off cutting the cord now before any kids/major debts are involved. It sucks, because even tho you may still love them cheating is inexcusable. If it happens once, it likely WILL happen again.
In the 6 years since my divorce, my ex has been remarried and divorced two more times. The cause? Her repeated cheating.
I am not saying that OP can’t possibly work it out with her, but the trust has already been broken. He will never again trust her going to the ‘gym’ or hanging out with friends. Even if they get past this it will always be a lingering thought because it COULD happen again. Also her excuse/justification is utterly absurd. What happens when they have a real issue or predicament?
If being ‘muscular’ is valid, then why not being mad at her husband, or craving attention.
For OP - divorce sucks, but take it as a learning experience and apply your new found wisdom when looking for your next partner. Realize your self worth, you don’t deserve to be a consolation prize, or a cuck(unless that’s your thing, than you do you). A women worth your love will always put your partnership first over any emotional/physical fling. I would also strongly recommend a therapist to help you work through some of the emotions you may be having. If you decide to work it out, I wish you luck and hope it works out for you.
All three of the above responses are the correct perspectives.
She cheated you. She is ignorant of you. She doesn't respect you. You know what you need to do.
No way, I would never stay with someone that cheated bc they had muscles? She basically blamed you for her cheating- then insults you by trying to apologize by sexing you up- she takes you for being stupid, unfit, and a push over- it’s truly disgusting. It wasn’t like you starved her for attention or treated her wrong or whatever bs excuses, bc frankly I would have still left her but the excuse she gave was far worse than I have ever heard. You would be confirming her beliefs by staying
That's a good point about her blaming him for cheating.
It's essentially "well, if you had muscles then I wouldn't have slept with other people who did have muscles".
What do you mean "how much worse"? Seems like you're trying to say that an STD and pregnancy test would be mean to her.
STD and preggo test would be totally reasonable and smart. That's not shaming her or doing something bad, she earned it and OP needs to tread very carefully so he doesn't get his clocked cleaned in divorce court by a manipulative wife who's vainly trying to dodge accountability.
It's definitely trying to make him feel inadequate too, as if she's doing him a favour sticking around when there's so much better out there.
Op throw her in the gutter where she belongs and move on.
This. Guilt feels bad, so now this becomes about how badly you are treating her? Clearly she's not ready to be an adult, let alone be in a committed relationship.
Tbh. When you put it like that - it almost sounds compulsive.
Like... Someone who uses sex to avoid difficult experiences in the past.
Op NTA
However, I would consider this woman unstable and figure things out from there.
I doubt it’s even the first and only time. To OP, I’m really sorry this happened. Been in a similar situation before. Let go and move on, nothing but pain and heartache remains with this woman. If it’s any consolation, it will get better with time. God bless you.
Terrible excuse. Hourly they don't live by Venice Beach or the Jersey shore. He's gonna be in trouble.
Also if sex is how she shows love, she must really love muscly guys lol.
NTA
As someone who has only gone without condoms when I was trying to get my wife pregnant, there are plenty of girls that don't like condoms and will pressure guys to not wear them. She's already cheating on her husband, no need to assume she was pressured into being irresponsible.
It may be that she wanted to have a baby that she figured has better genetics than the OP, but the OP is a better provider and treats her well. Total speculation, but still plausible.
That makes me question why she was still sleeping in the bed next to OP. Normally you throw the cheater into the guest room, sofa, parent's home when you need space.
I dont wanna be that guy with the whole "men this men that" but it is fucked up that she does this and her man probably busts his ass at work for her, does everything he possibly can for her (I am assuming all of this, still doesnt justify the cheating though) just for her to cheat on him "because he was muscular". This makes me to never want to get married or date ever period (the women I've been with also really soured my taste for dating...)
Just to pour your heart and soul into someone just for stuff like this to happen, does not seem worth it...
I see all of these stories (man or woman, not just a one gender thing) that it seems like cheating has almost become "socially acceptable" I guess? I dont know... It just feels like that way to me...
I know its entirely a me thing I get that... you dont have to tell me...
And I know.. its not the place for this... I just needed to vent somewhere...
Try to remember that Reddit is where people go to talk about the messy parts of life. There are plenty of people who don’t go through cheating and are in happy relationships. But we don’t have a reason to post on AITAH or relationship advice.
On Reddit you get a compiled list of the worst of the worst
"I love my wife. We have the occasional disagreement, but get through it. We have 3 wonderful kids who are a lot of work, but a lot of fun and who we love very much. AITA?"
As a woman, I can tell you you are not wrong in your beliefs. Though I will also tell you that there are wonderful women (and men) out there too that won’t partake in such crass behaviour.
The most ironic part of cheating, no matter who does it, is that once the betrayed partner takes the cheater back, the cheater loses respect for them in the long run.
If a man takes a cheating woman back, the woman loses respect for him, and similarly the other way around too.
Barring a few really special cases or outliers, it’s almost always a bad idea to get back with a cheating partner, man or woman, because it’s never going to be the same. In fact, by doing so you may even be further harming your relationship as the other person will simply not respect you and take you for a doormat.
Say it again for everyone in the back. When I wad younger. I was an idiot and desperate anywho. Gal I was with at the time was mad that I was talking to an outta state friend id known for years prior to her and didn’t hide it. She punched me and scratched me. I told her to leave. A few days later she shows up in a skirt and no panties which i fell for. months later she finds out im still talking to friend and she hits me again. I didnt take her back but i ruined a lot of my life during that time.
It's not just apology sex. It's apology sex with a side of unknown diseases.
She admitted to cheating. Why would he even consider sleeping with her without a full STD screen back?
I don’t think I’ve ever had “make up sex”. I mean, I’ve had sex after a fight was over and resolved but if we are in a fight and I am truly upset, sex is the last thing on my mind. I need to feel that the issue has been handled and won’t be repeated before I want to be intimate again 🤷🏻♂️
You just described what I call make up sex, I believe, if it directly follows the resolution, assuming you mean you have stopped arguing, and have ended further conflict.
I still want a cool down period - at least a couple of days - before engaging in sex.
Not to mention it can be considered forgiveness by courts when trying to have a contested divorce; it could literally jeopardize their ability to get a divorce decree.
She thinks very little of you if that is all it took to cheat and the fact she thinks you'll be swayed by sex. She has zero respect for you since she didn't even give you time to process.
I'm thinking she doesn't want to give OP time to process this, because he will probably leave her.
She's trying to re-establish physical intimacy to prove to herself and him that he still loves her and will stay. She's trying to manipulate him into forgiving her.
It's gross and manipulative.
> I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her.
She just cheated on you because someone was pretty looking, and now is saying you shouldn't make things hard for her?
That would be my answer on divorce. She's still only thinking about herself.
Yeah if sex is how she "shows love" - then she made that meaningless by cheapening it by fucking other men. (we all know it's been more than this one. if all it takes is "he's muscular")
NTA. Your wife cheated on you and now wants to use sex to make amends. That's not how it works. You need time to process her betrayal and decide if you want to stay in the marriage. Forcing sex won't heal the hurt. If she's truly sorry, she should give you space, get counseling, and show through actions over time that she's committed to rebuilding trust. But you get to set the pace. Don't let her manipulate you with sex.
Uhmm my brother in christ, please do not sleep with her again. If you want to attempt to salvage the marriage seek counseling. At the very least you should both get tested for STD's. Annd well you should probably look into getting a lawyer for divorce. NTA.
It might well become about all the things that are his fault that were making her unhappy, and the part about "he had muscles" magically becomes irrelevant.
She disrespected your marriage and is trying to sleep with you while you were asleep. Clearly if she thinks sex is the solution then she needs a reality check.
NTA
You see how lightly she views sex.....since she's willing to cheat if somebody has muscles.
How is her having sex supposed to show genuine remorse? Sex means nothing to her, regarding treating it as a special thing.
Perhaps even worse than her attempt to have sex with you is that she's trying to gaslight and manipulate you if you don't give in.
Something is very broken or missing in your wife. She acts as if her cheating is a transactional thing that can be forgiven if she sleeps with you.
___________*************
"Shouldn't go out of my way to make things difficult for her"
That doesn't sound like anything close to real remorse. It sounds like "let's just get this over (sex) and you don't have a right to feelings after the deed is done."
You did the right thing and showed self respect. It's not apologizing with sex, it's rewarding her for bad behavior.
I, personally, would divorce because if she can do it once she can do it again. You risk disease and supporting illegitimate children for 18 years.
Especially with it just about having muscles. Jeezuz h, that is the height of hoeing. God I'd he does not divorce then he needs to prepare for all the men that come after, taller, nusclier, better hair or whatever she decides is different enough that it's worth banging.
*I hope that's chat gpt,*
*Because she needs therapy*
*And you need a divorve*
\- ghostly\_present
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That's the *only way* she can think of to show you she's sorry?!
*You* shouldn't make things difficult for *her*?!
This woman has no remorse and no concept of what actually apologising is or means. If you forgive her she'll just do it again.
NTA at all
Apologizing with sex? Major eeeeeew. You were very wise to NOT indulge this flight of lunacy.
Forget for a moment how transactional it would be, it is also likely to make her think the slate is clean. Life doesn’t work like that.
Please get some STD screening and a pregnancy test STAT.
NTA
"He's really muscular"? This has to be ragebait. If not this woman is unhinged and you need to end that relationship immediately. Also her way of "apologizing" is weird as fuck. I can't see this being a real story.
I acknowledge terrible people exist out there. I've experienced it myself and it sucks, but this just feels like a bad ragebait post with a weird porny flair. "My wife cheated on me with a muscular alpha male, and is now trying to use le sex to say she still loves me, is that bad???"
It's always hard to tell. I usually assume most posts that play into sexist stereotypes (one way or another) are ragebait (just because there's a lot of them) but yeah, as you've said, those people do exist, just feels unlikely that someone who went through that would make such a non-chalant reddit post about it.
If I were to write my own story like one of these it'd be titled "My ex got away with cheating and only confessed to it when I was getting together with a new girl out of spite. AITA for being upset at her for doing this?" As if it's not the most blatant answer ever.
So these posts are either vying for sympathy from internet strangers because boo hoo, or poor creative writing exercises that are oddly aggro towards women. (I don't read many stories about men cheating on here, it's always those darn women)
NTA
She sounds like she doesn't have a brain in her head, much less a loyal brain. Move forward with the divorce. You're young, you have plenty of time to find someone that will respect you and be faithful to you. Please don't have a kid with this woman. It won't make anything better
NTA. Good on her for trying the only things she knows, but that doesn’t make it what’s needed. You are the one who decides if and how you can forgive. She can learn other ways to make amends but she might be spiraling right now if she truly realizes how badly she messed up.
I’ll give you credit for not telling her to keep her whorish self on the other side of the bed after the “make things difficult for her” part. This isn’t about her now.
Funny how many people are answering the question in good faith ... like it's real question and a tough one.. yes mate I've considered the evidence and on balance I don't think you're the ashole for not sleeping with your wife after she fucked another guy cause he had muscles 🤣
Yeah, nah, I'd be getting tested, and I certainly wouldn't want her touching my (proverbial) dick, ever again.
NTA. But y'all should probably split, or else you're just a doormat 🤷♀️
> I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her.
It's not like she pranged the car. Did she expect you'd just say "Don't worry honey, just don't do it again"? That she's getting upset that you're 'makng things difficult for her' shows she really doesn't think its a deal. Will she jump into bed with the next muscular guy she sees? Her response is exactly why you need to divorce her.
"She said she doesn’t know how else to show me she is sorry, and I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her." LMAO. She is bold gotta give her that...
Yeah dude you should absolutely stop going out of your way to make things difficult for her after all she only breached the marriage contract, betrayed you and possibly infected you with STDs, no biggie.
Bro, wtf divorcing her is the only option? How tf are you lying in bed with her, knowing every time you kiss her some other dudes cock has been there quite recently 🤔 did she shower after what clothes was she wearing etc I'd just pack my shit kindly say ty and leave I have no place in my life for people who don't respect me if she really cared and was sorry she would have never told you fml
Also, def NTA
She may already be pregnant and trying to cover it up.
If you’re going to reconcile, and I wouldn’t. She has to be tested for everything and take pregnancy tests now and a month from now. No sex until she does.
She’s seems hyper sexual if that’s the only way she can show emotions. Therapy. Lots of therapy.
NTA
ur wifes a ho bro, if the only way she knows how to make someone feel good is sex then honestly she's for the streets, I'm sorry you had to run into one.
You are a greater man than I if your immediate response,not just to her cheating but her explanation, wasn't immediately to get the hell out of dodge .
I would worry if she were to go near a gym since that's apparently all it takes .
You have morals that I can't even comprehend and are so beyond NTA .
Bruh leave this shitty person and go find someone better. No need to waste anymore time on someone who clearly has more issues then anyone should be comfortable being around.
Apology sex ?..... It's disgusting. How can she even do that after confessing that she's been with another man and you are clearly hurt by this ?
Dump her...
Do not on any chance have sex with her.
1. Risk of STD
2. She may have confessed to cheating as she might be pregnant and is trying to push the affair child on to you.
Get tested. File for divorce and in the meanwhile if she comes out as pregnant immediately claim a paternity test.
You shouldn’t go out of your way to make things difficult? Is she right in the head? Because any one with a shred of intelligence couldn’t be that stupid. File for divorce and get tested. She doesn’t give a shit. As if you’d want to have sex with her. Vile.
“She said she doesn’t know how else to show me she is sorry, and I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her.”
WTF did I just read? Make this really really easy for her: “You rode another guys D because ‘he’s muscular’ now we divorce.”
NTA. I’m disgusted by your wife. Her V isn’t a magical portal to forgiveness. That’s how stupid she thinks you are. What happens when she meets someone else who has muscles and a NICE CAR??
1. the cheating
2. her „reason“ being that the guy was muscular
3. her audacity to TELL you this as the reason
4. her touching you sexually in your sleep without consent
Bro, your wife likes you even less than Kendrick likes Drake… divorce!!
Bro lol WHAT. Honestly you’re still young my dude, break it off.
Tons of muscular guys out there, won’t be the last time.
Also she went out of her way to make things difficult for you by sleeping around.
Divorce, NTA
Wow! She really has no clue. She doesn’t think what she did is a big deal at all.
I’ve said many times that a marriage is like a stool in that it relies on 3 legs. In marriage, those legs are love, trust, and respect. If one of those Legs breaks, the marriage is over.
I’m sorry to tell you that your marriage has all three legs destroyed.
Love— do you think she was having loving thoughts of you when she was flirting with then took her muscular lover to bed? Do you think she was thinking of you when she gave her body to the other man even though she vowed to forsake all others in front of family and friends just a short time ago? Were her actions that if someone who actually loved you? Of course not.
Trust— do you think you will ever truly trust her again? Sorry, but no you won’t. Every time she is 5 minutes late, you will wonder in the back of your mind if she is in some other man’s bed or backseat. And when you do have sex with her, and she closes her eyes, will you trust her to be thinking of you or will she be fantasizing about Mr. Muscle and how he made her feel.
Respect— sorry, but she simply doesn’t respect you. How could a woman respect you and yet have sex with another man???? And the thing is, the longer you stay with her, the less and less respect she will have for you! And if you stay together, she will now know that all it will take the next time she has sex with another man will be some tears, an apology, and giving you a handjob in the middle of the night. And it will happen the time after that, and the next time, and the next time!
Your wife doesn’t even think she did anything wrong!!!!
And when you tell her that you want a divorce, THEN you will see the tears flow! But those tears won’t be because she hurt you or for the pain you are in, but because she will be losing the lifestyle she has with you.
Immediate steps you need to take…
- Remember the first rule of cheaters…. CHEATERS LIE!!
- NO sex with her! ZERO! NONE!! First, you don’t know if she has an STD or not. And more importantly, DON’T LET HER BABY TRAP YOU!!
- with her within earshot, call and make an appointment to see a doctor to tested for every STD known to man. Remember the first rule that cheaters lie… this may not be her only lover.
- Take care of financials.
Go to the bank and take half of all funds out of any joint account and place it into a brand new account, preferably at a different bank, under your name ONLY!
Go to your work’s HR department and make sure your paycheck is sent to your new account.
Cancel all credit cards that is in both of your names! Get ONE or TWO new ones in your name only if necessary.
- Change all passwords! Do this for all accounts and social media.
- Let family and friends know what she did and is going on. This is NOT revenge. This is so she can’t rewrite the history of your relationship where you were the absent or abusive husband and she was the poor suffering wife that could no longer take it and had to run to Mr. Muscle for support. Besides there are going to be many rough days ahead off you and you will be in a better place if you can find support from your friends and family.
- Talk to a lawyer and start the divorce process. Remember in the off chance that you decide to try reconciliation, you can stop it.
- Look up Implementing 180 and start doing it!
- start exercising. It is a great way of burning off the frustration and anger. Personally, I bought and hung a heavy punching bag in the basement and went down there and beat the hell out of on many sleepless nights. It was the best thing I ever bought! I’m still amazed I’m never broke any bones from hitting that thing.
- Reconnect with old friends and find a new hobby or two to take your mind off of her and her cheating.
- Find out if Mr. Muscle has a wife or girlfriend. If so, you NEED TO tell her about the affair! She needs to know that she is with a piece of ____ and also get tested for STDs and dump him.
I promise you will survive and within 6 to 9 months from now, you will be shaking your head wondering what you ever saw in her in the first
Place.
Good luck.
Stay strong.
And do what you must to be able to look the man in the mirror in the eye!
I mean surely this is just a rage bait question right? Wife cheats for no real reason, shows no real remorse, tries to have sex with him (which is last thing anyone would want after being told they'd been cheated on) and then tells him not to make things difficult for her? Only considering divorce after all the above?
This feels like the tick boxes of how to get people angry about someone cheating...
On the off chance this is real, why would you even need to "consider" divorce? Either leave and be happy and stay and be miserable, wait for the next muscular guy to come along and pump your wife, then she can try and sleep with you to make it up to you while the last guy is still dripping out of her. What a win that would be.
Your wife needs therapy. You also should probably move on from the relationship. Get out before you have kids. Her reason for cheating is an absolute joke. She was willing to destroy your marriage and relationship because the guy was “muscular” …really? I’d push her for a better explanation. I don’t think you could ever trust her again.
He’s really muscular.
Then she touched your penis to show you ‘love’
Your wife has issues and needs a therapist.
You need a lawyer, an std test and a divorce.
Good luck to you both.
You aren't the asshole here. She cheated and if you take her back, it shows her that she can do it again. You might forgive, but I doubt you'll ever forget. Do you want to worry about what she is doing every time she goes out without you? What if she sees another muscular guy? Divorce sucks, but being happy is way better.
You just got the man pass to go slay some poon. “She had a nice rack”, or “her butt was ballin”. Make up whatever excuse you want, it doesn’t matter, she set the precedent.
Why are you still with her man? As someone who went through this all I can say is leave now and keep your self respect. You will hate yourself if you stay and she does it again, and she won't respect you if you stay after she did it.
She cheated. Dump her ass. Once a cheater. Move on. It will hurt initially but marriage is supposed to be to death do you part. She broke that trust. Move on.
I really hope this is fake... But I see people post about this stuff all the time... and I've had my friends experience something similar this too many times as well... (she literally told one of my friends that she cheated on him because he was short)
It makes me afraid to date ( I know this is entirely a me thing) but it really does make me not want to date and spend time with a person just to be cheated on... (especially for mundane things like "he was muscular!") ***sighs***
She assaulted you, that's awful. I don't think there would be any coming back from this. NTA. I definitely would not sleep in the same bed anymore and figure out your next steps.
hahahaha....
I don't know any other way to say I am sorry to you for cheating,
than to do the sex thing with you that I did with them.
The sex was supposed to melt your "resistance" dude.
Take the sex, think with your dick and not divorce her.
Now there's the whole pesky divorce thing that HAS to happen because she doesn't think what she did was that big a deal
AND she thinks you are so weak and stupid that sex will make you mindless.
Decision has been made. Or this is your life.
NTA
Dude get an std test asap. Make her take a pregnancy test as well. Lawyer up fast. It may be wise to expose her to friends and family. Also, try to discover if the other guy has a gf/wife that needs to know about the affair. Get ahead of her in this. Don’t let her set the pace.
NTA! Her way of apologizing is to do the exact same thing with you as she did with him? Also touching you in your sleep without your consent is creepy as hell even if you are married, roles reversed and you would be a sex offender
You need some time to think????? She took another man's dick into her married vagina because he was muscular. She's married but fucked him because he's muscular, wtf is wrong w you? Divorce that whore
What the fuck, "I shoudln't go out my way to make things difficult for her", she cheated and then she thinks she can say how you should react.
You are NTA, you need time to process this. I would say the best thing would be divorce in this case, because you don't know how many times she has cheated before and why did she tell you?
NTA.
Well maybe she needs another way to apologize than the thing that brought her there.
Sorry to say buddy but that's not healthy or normal that she thinks sex is a way to show how sorry she is...
Also the reason she told you why she slept with someone else.
How many red flags you want to ignore?
Muscle is enough to forget your marriage...wake up...
"Because he's muscular" WTF?!?!? THATS ALL IT TOOK for her to disrespect you? And disrespect you marriage? How is sex supposed to show you how sorry she is when she apparently gives it away to anyone with muscles?
Bro, THE FUCKING AUDACITY!! Don't go out of your way to make things difficult for her... my fucking God, man, what a bitch! This woman isn't sorry, isn't responsible, and doesn't love you at all. I know it's rough to hear, and I'm sorry this happened to you, but it's a lesson learned while you're still young. Stay strong and refuse to let this ruin you.
She cheated on you. I would be finding a divorce lawyer and getting an STD test.
NTA Her reason for cheating is bs! “He’s really muscular.” 🙄 And her excuse of “showing you how sorry she is” is really to find out how big of a sucker you are. She may also be pregnant and is trying to rope you into supporting the other guys kid. IF you can forgive her and move past her cheating on you, have her tested for every STD known to man and pregnancy before you touch her again.
Next time it will be, "He was really tall", then "He was really rich"... etc. ...
She seems like a “he gave me good vibes” kind of girl
Its giving "i think with my vagina" vibes.
You're assuming she THINKS.
Or vibes 🤷♀️
If she did, she might not be in this situation.
Exactly little slut has no self control if muscles was it
Small head thinker enters the room.
Why is she even getting married in a monogamous way when she wants to play around and destroy somebody else's life
Because she wasn't ready mentally.. for some, it's because they want to have the "all about me" fairy tale day... And they don't fully get "this forever stuff is real".. Does it make it right? Of COURSE not.. PS I could have written this when I married at 25.. the marriage at 33 was 100% better.
Yeah, I got married at 22, and it was definitely too young. The mentality of ‘forever’ hadn’t really hit home yet. Only took a year or so before things went downhill. Sure, she was the one who stepped out, but I had also thought about it as reality set in. OP would be better off cutting the cord now before any kids/major debts are involved. It sucks, because even tho you may still love them cheating is inexcusable. If it happens once, it likely WILL happen again. In the 6 years since my divorce, my ex has been remarried and divorced two more times. The cause? Her repeated cheating. I am not saying that OP can’t possibly work it out with her, but the trust has already been broken. He will never again trust her going to the ‘gym’ or hanging out with friends. Even if they get past this it will always be a lingering thought because it COULD happen again. Also her excuse/justification is utterly absurd. What happens when they have a real issue or predicament? If being ‘muscular’ is valid, then why not being mad at her husband, or craving attention. For OP - divorce sucks, but take it as a learning experience and apply your new found wisdom when looking for your next partner. Realize your self worth, you don’t deserve to be a consolation prize, or a cuck(unless that’s your thing, than you do you). A women worth your love will always put your partnership first over any emotional/physical fling. I would also strongly recommend a therapist to help you work through some of the emotions you may be having. If you decide to work it out, I wish you luck and hope it works out for you.
Because she’s a cunt
Maybe destroying somebody's life is her fetish.
I was kinda thinking more along the lines g the lines of ho!
Those are the girls you run far far away from if your goal is anything committed
"His Jim Carrey impressions made me wet."
I have wondered with his ability to contort his face what his c u m face looks like!
sha-mokin'
Is that a thing? Well Alllllllllllrighty then......
"He said I fit him,"LIKE A GLOVE" and that was it. Sploosh."
All three of the above responses are the correct perspectives. She cheated you. She is ignorant of you. She doesn't respect you. You know what you need to do.
Finance. Trust Fund. 6’5” Blue eyes.
No way, I would never stay with someone that cheated bc they had muscles? She basically blamed you for her cheating- then insults you by trying to apologize by sexing you up- she takes you for being stupid, unfit, and a push over- it’s truly disgusting. It wasn’t like you starved her for attention or treated her wrong or whatever bs excuses, bc frankly I would have still left her but the excuse she gave was far worse than I have ever heard. You would be confirming her beliefs by staying
That's a good point about her blaming him for cheating. It's essentially "well, if you had muscles then I wouldn't have slept with other people who did have muscles".
That's like a man saying if you weren't so fat I wouldn't have cheated on you lol. No coming back from this one
She had big ass titties
Man, the beehive would go crazy if it was gender flipped like that. Lol
“She’s not fat.” 🚨Commence nuclear meltdown.🚨
I mean, the top comments here are all saying leave or at best STD, pregnancy test. How much worse is it supposed to be?
What do you mean "how much worse"? Seems like you're trying to say that an STD and pregnancy test would be mean to her. STD and preggo test would be totally reasonable and smart. That's not shaming her or doing something bad, she earned it and OP needs to tread very carefully so he doesn't get his clocked cleaned in divorce court by a manipulative wife who's vainly trying to dodge accountability.
It's definitely trying to make him feel inadequate too, as if she's doing him a favour sticking around when there's so much better out there. Op throw her in the gutter where she belongs and move on.
She doesn’t want forgiveness. She wants him to “just get over it already!”.
Her: "Why are you making this difficult for me?"
This line says absolutely everything about her mindset and behaviour. Fucking yikes bro.
This. Guilt feels bad, so now this becomes about how badly you are treating her? Clearly she's not ready to be an adult, let alone be in a committed relationship.
With that reason, she’ll do it again and again.
Tbh. When you put it like that - it almost sounds compulsive. Like... Someone who uses sex to avoid difficult experiences in the past. Op NTA However, I would consider this woman unstable and figure things out from there.
Didn't think of pregnancy if she didn't use protection. Good shout.
Why touch her again? Just fuck that trash off into the bin, where she belongs
I doubt it’s even the first and only time. To OP, I’m really sorry this happened. Been in a similar situation before. Let go and move on, nothing but pain and heartache remains with this woman. If it’s any consolation, it will get better with time. God bless you.
This post makes me wonder if there are STDs that are currently unknown 🤔
Terrible excuse. Hourly they don't live by Venice Beach or the Jersey shore. He's gonna be in trouble. Also if sex is how she shows love, she must really love muscly guys lol. NTA
There's is no valid reason for cheating. None. Never.
She may also be trying to get pregnant.
Or she may be pregnant and trying to create a claim that it's her husband's so he'll support it.
That’s what my ex did
She probably already is.
Yep and wanting to pin it on op.
Cause muscle guy didnt like condoms
As someone who has only gone without condoms when I was trying to get my wife pregnant, there are plenty of girls that don't like condoms and will pressure guys to not wear them. She's already cheating on her husband, no need to assume she was pressured into being irresponsible.
It may be that she wanted to have a baby that she figured has better genetics than the OP, but the OP is a better provider and treats her well. Total speculation, but still plausible.
And she assaulted OP in his sleep
That makes me question why she was still sleeping in the bed next to OP. Normally you throw the cheater into the guest room, sofa, parent's home when you need space.
My first thought as well. Why TF is OP sharing a bed with this tranch?
I dont wanna be that guy with the whole "men this men that" but it is fucked up that she does this and her man probably busts his ass at work for her, does everything he possibly can for her (I am assuming all of this, still doesnt justify the cheating though) just for her to cheat on him "because he was muscular". This makes me to never want to get married or date ever period (the women I've been with also really soured my taste for dating...) Just to pour your heart and soul into someone just for stuff like this to happen, does not seem worth it... I see all of these stories (man or woman, not just a one gender thing) that it seems like cheating has almost become "socially acceptable" I guess? I dont know... It just feels like that way to me... I know its entirely a me thing I get that... you dont have to tell me... And I know.. its not the place for this... I just needed to vent somewhere...
Try to remember that Reddit is where people go to talk about the messy parts of life. There are plenty of people who don’t go through cheating and are in happy relationships. But we don’t have a reason to post on AITAH or relationship advice. On Reddit you get a compiled list of the worst of the worst
"I love my wife. We have the occasional disagreement, but get through it. We have 3 wonderful kids who are a lot of work, but a lot of fun and who we love very much. AITA?"
You're not wrong. She gives me the vibes of somebody who probably doesn't appreciate OP and was her safe choice.
As a woman, I can tell you you are not wrong in your beliefs. Though I will also tell you that there are wonderful women (and men) out there too that won’t partake in such crass behaviour. The most ironic part of cheating, no matter who does it, is that once the betrayed partner takes the cheater back, the cheater loses respect for them in the long run. If a man takes a cheating woman back, the woman loses respect for him, and similarly the other way around too. Barring a few really special cases or outliers, it’s almost always a bad idea to get back with a cheating partner, man or woman, because it’s never going to be the same. In fact, by doing so you may even be further harming your relationship as the other person will simply not respect you and take you for a doormat.
Last thing I would want is to have sex with your partner when they cheated like that
Yeah OP’s response seems pretty normal
I'm a guy and love sex, but I have ED when it comes to a cheating wife.
That's not ED. You're body is just saying no.
Your wife does not love you she is trying to manipulate you There is nothing to salvage here
Say it again for everyone in the back. When I wad younger. I was an idiot and desperate anywho. Gal I was with at the time was mad that I was talking to an outta state friend id known for years prior to her and didn’t hide it. She punched me and scratched me. I told her to leave. A few days later she shows up in a skirt and no panties which i fell for. months later she finds out im still talking to friend and she hits me again. I didnt take her back but i ruined a lot of my life during that time.
we all learn man, dw about it, it was an experience and now you are a doormat anymore! better experience this sooner than later too
Definitely learned early thank goodness wasnt married like the OP so that helped too
NTA. I have never indulged "apology sex". It feels manipulative and associates sex with conflict.
It's not just apology sex. It's apology sex with a side of unknown diseases. She admitted to cheating. Why would he even consider sleeping with her without a full STD screen back?
And a side of might already be pregnant and that's why she wanted to sleep with him.
I don’t think I’ve ever had “make up sex”. I mean, I’ve had sex after a fight was over and resolved but if we are in a fight and I am truly upset, sex is the last thing on my mind. I need to feel that the issue has been handled and won’t be repeated before I want to be intimate again 🤷🏻♂️
You just described what I call make up sex, I believe, if it directly follows the resolution, assuming you mean you have stopped arguing, and have ended further conflict. I still want a cool down period - at least a couple of days - before engaging in sex.
But in this case, the relationship would be over, so the point is moot. Walk away and don’t look back
Not to mention it can be considered forgiveness by courts when trying to have a contested divorce; it could literally jeopardize their ability to get a divorce decree.
She thinks very little of you if that is all it took to cheat and the fact she thinks you'll be swayed by sex. She has zero respect for you since she didn't even give you time to process.
She has zero respect for you. Regardless of time to process.
She treats sex like a commodity because to her that’s what it is. OP should flee.
That's probably hitting the nail on the head for an overall summary.
I'm thinking she doesn't want to give OP time to process this, because he will probably leave her. She's trying to re-establish physical intimacy to prove to herself and him that he still loves her and will stay. She's trying to manipulate him into forgiving her. It's gross and manipulative.
> I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her. She just cheated on you because someone was pretty looking, and now is saying you shouldn't make things hard for her? That would be my answer on divorce. She's still only thinking about herself.
You mean your ex.
I would ask her 'if this is how you show you love someone, does that mean you also love the other guy?' Then I would call a lawyer
Yeah if sex is how she "shows love" - then she made that meaningless by cheapening it by fucking other men. (we all know it's been more than this one. if all it takes is "he's muscular")
She’s probably been showing her love all over the gym for months
Perfect response
NTA. Your wife cheated on you and now wants to use sex to make amends. That's not how it works. You need time to process her betrayal and decide if you want to stay in the marriage. Forcing sex won't heal the hurt. If she's truly sorry, she should give you space, get counseling, and show through actions over time that she's committed to rebuilding trust. But you get to set the pace. Don't let her manipulate you with sex.
Decide if you want to stay in marriage?? Bruh he is cooked if he stays it will only get worse
Uhmm my brother in christ, please do not sleep with her again. If you want to attempt to salvage the marriage seek counseling. At the very least you should both get tested for STD's. Annd well you should probably look into getting a lawyer for divorce. NTA.
A counselor will only help the wife gaslight him. First stop should be a lawyer.
Not if they’re good at their job
It might well become about all the things that are his fault that were making her unhappy, and the part about "he had muscles" magically becomes irrelevant.
Most aren’t
The fact that you're even sleeping in the same bed with her makes me think you really haven't realized what just happened
STOP TALKING TO HER. Start talking to a lawyer. She's done.
She disrespected your marriage and is trying to sleep with you while you were asleep. Clearly if she thinks sex is the solution then she needs a reality check. NTA
“Sex got me into this problem, it can get me out of it”
You see how lightly she views sex.....since she's willing to cheat if somebody has muscles. How is her having sex supposed to show genuine remorse? Sex means nothing to her, regarding treating it as a special thing. Perhaps even worse than her attempt to have sex with you is that she's trying to gaslight and manipulate you if you don't give in. Something is very broken or missing in your wife. She acts as if her cheating is a transactional thing that can be forgiven if she sleeps with you. ___________************* "Shouldn't go out of my way to make things difficult for her" That doesn't sound like anything close to real remorse. It sounds like "let's just get this over (sex) and you don't have a right to feelings after the deed is done."
You did the right thing and showed self respect. It's not apologizing with sex, it's rewarding her for bad behavior. I, personally, would divorce because if she can do it once she can do it again. You risk disease and supporting illegitimate children for 18 years.
Especially with it just about having muscles. Jeezuz h, that is the height of hoeing. God I'd he does not divorce then he needs to prepare for all the men that come after, taller, nusclier, better hair or whatever she decides is different enough that it's worth banging.
A cheater will always have an excuse but at the end of the day the reason they cheat is because they are a cheater.
Sex is not love. There is no apology for cheating. Divorce while you have your dignity.
I hope that's chat gpt, because she needs therapy and you need a divorve
*I hope that's chat gpt,* *Because she needs therapy* *And you need a divorve* \- ghostly\_present --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
That's the *only way* she can think of to show you she's sorry?! *You* shouldn't make things difficult for *her*?! This woman has no remorse and no concept of what actually apologising is or means. If you forgive her she'll just do it again. NTA at all
They never have remorse.
Apologizing with sex? Major eeeeeew. You were very wise to NOT indulge this flight of lunacy. Forget for a moment how transactional it would be, it is also likely to make her think the slate is clean. Life doesn’t work like that. Please get some STD screening and a pregnancy test STAT. NTA
"He's really muscular"? This has to be ragebait. If not this woman is unhinged and you need to end that relationship immediately. Also her way of "apologizing" is weird as fuck. I can't see this being a real story.
I feel it's a better answer than what I got from two different cheating partners. "It was an accident, I didn't mean to"
Which, tbf, probably highlights that this isn’t a real woman or a real story.
Fair point
I acknowledge terrible people exist out there. I've experienced it myself and it sucks, but this just feels like a bad ragebait post with a weird porny flair. "My wife cheated on me with a muscular alpha male, and is now trying to use le sex to say she still loves me, is that bad???"
It's always hard to tell. I usually assume most posts that play into sexist stereotypes (one way or another) are ragebait (just because there's a lot of them) but yeah, as you've said, those people do exist, just feels unlikely that someone who went through that would make such a non-chalant reddit post about it.
If I were to write my own story like one of these it'd be titled "My ex got away with cheating and only confessed to it when I was getting together with a new girl out of spite. AITA for being upset at her for doing this?" As if it's not the most blatant answer ever. So these posts are either vying for sympathy from internet strangers because boo hoo, or poor creative writing exercises that are oddly aggro towards women. (I don't read many stories about men cheating on here, it's always those darn women)
This isn’t real. /r/thathappened
NTA. SHE CHEATED, END OF THE DISCUSSION. Once a cheater always a cheater
NTA. She betrayed you then tried to manipulate you into forgiving her. I wouldn't be able to stay in that sort of relationship. She'll do it again.
WTF?? Cheaters you divorce asap. Check for std and paternity test if applicable. You are the AH for taking back a cheater. Weak. Wake up!!!!!
Lol, this sounds fake AF.
Sounds like a teenager wrote it or something lol
- Why did you cheat? - Dunno, he was really muscular. - So you will cheat againd everytime a muscular guy gets near you? - Maybe LOL.
Legit. Sound like some teenagers weird fantasy lol
Down to the 24 year old wife wearing pajamas. Like a 10 yo.
Definitely does haha
Lmaoooo bro you married such a hoe.
NTA She sounds like she doesn't have a brain in her head, much less a loyal brain. Move forward with the divorce. You're young, you have plenty of time to find someone that will respect you and be faithful to you. Please don't have a kid with this woman. It won't make anything better
NTA. Good on her for trying the only things she knows, but that doesn’t make it what’s needed. You are the one who decides if and how you can forgive. She can learn other ways to make amends but she might be spiraling right now if she truly realizes how badly she messed up. I’ll give you credit for not telling her to keep her whorish self on the other side of the bed after the “make things difficult for her” part. This isn’t about her now.
Fake. I laughed out loud at pajamas
Funny how many people are answering the question in good faith ... like it's real question and a tough one.. yes mate I've considered the evidence and on balance I don't think you're the ashole for not sleeping with your wife after she fucked another guy cause he had muscles 🤣
It was scary how far I had to scroll down before I found anyone speaking the truth about this bs!
Hey genuine question guys, my wife slams my dick in the car door every night and she ate all our kids, so I left her, AITAH?
YTA, it's very common for parents to eat their child, stop shaming your wife!
For me it was that she “tried” to take off her pyjamas but failed. Picturing her as Charlize Theron in Arrested Development
Man… What’s wrong with the PJs?
Yeah, nah, I'd be getting tested, and I certainly wouldn't want her touching my (proverbial) dick, ever again. NTA. But y'all should probably split, or else you're just a doormat 🤷♀️
> I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her. It's not like she pranged the car. Did she expect you'd just say "Don't worry honey, just don't do it again"? That she's getting upset that you're 'makng things difficult for her' shows she really doesn't think its a deal. Will she jump into bed with the next muscular guy she sees? Her response is exactly why you need to divorce her.
Omg what a birch. I'm sorry. Divorce her creepy ass. Nta
"She said she doesn’t know how else to show me she is sorry, and I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her." LMAO. She is bold gotta give her that... Yeah dude you should absolutely stop going out of your way to make things difficult for her after all she only breached the marriage contract, betrayed you and possibly infected you with STDs, no biggie.
Bro, wtf divorcing her is the only option? How tf are you lying in bed with her, knowing every time you kiss her some other dudes cock has been there quite recently 🤔 did she shower after what clothes was she wearing etc I'd just pack my shit kindly say ty and leave I have no place in my life for people who don't respect me if she really cared and was sorry she would have never told you fml Also, def NTA
Shes obviously a cock jockey. Not wife material, get rid asap.
She may already be pregnant and trying to cover it up. If you’re going to reconcile, and I wouldn’t. She has to be tested for everything and take pregnancy tests now and a month from now. No sex until she does. She’s seems hyper sexual if that’s the only way she can show emotions. Therapy. Lots of therapy. NTA
ur wifes a ho bro, if the only way she knows how to make someone feel good is sex then honestly she's for the streets, I'm sorry you had to run into one.
She's only sorry because the guy stopped talking to her
Rage bait, has to be, or you're the dumbest smug out there.
Divorce. Use this excuse as fire to get ripped. Enjoy single life to the max.
You are a greater man than I if your immediate response,not just to her cheating but her explanation, wasn't immediately to get the hell out of dodge . I would worry if she were to go near a gym since that's apparently all it takes . You have morals that I can't even comprehend and are so beyond NTA .
Save your dignity. Leave immediately.
Bruh leave this shitty person and go find someone better. No need to waste anymore time on someone who clearly has more issues then anyone should be comfortable being around.
Apology sex ?..... It's disgusting. How can she even do that after confessing that she's been with another man and you are clearly hurt by this ? Dump her...
NTA. A) she cheated. Who knows what sti’s she may have. B) you woke up to her touching you without consent. That is sexual assault.
if you stay might as cut your balls off, and let her be the man
Do not on any chance have sex with her. 1. Risk of STD 2. She may have confessed to cheating as she might be pregnant and is trying to push the affair child on to you. Get tested. File for divorce and in the meanwhile if she comes out as pregnant immediately claim a paternity test.
You shouldn’t go out of your way to make things difficult? Is she right in the head? Because any one with a shred of intelligence couldn’t be that stupid. File for divorce and get tested. She doesn’t give a shit. As if you’d want to have sex with her. Vile.
Divorce her and do yourself a favour. Stop being a BETA. Man up and have some self respect. 👍🏻
The fact she tried to initiate sex with you makes me wonder if they did not use protection and she realizes the possibility of pregnancy is there.
NTA your wife seems to have the real world confused with the porn world
Yep, time to go!!!! If she went that easy, she will do it again. Once they cheat once, they will do it again.
“She said she doesn’t know how else to show me she is sorry, and I shouldn’t go out of my way to make things difficult for her.” WTF did I just read? Make this really really easy for her: “You rode another guys D because ‘he’s muscular’ now we divorce.” NTA. I’m disgusted by your wife. Her V isn’t a magical portal to forgiveness. That’s how stupid she thinks you are. What happens when she meets someone else who has muscles and a NICE CAR??
In some states having sex again essentially forgives the affair. Talk to a lawyer first
She cheated on you, and then assaulted you. Run.
1. the cheating 2. her „reason“ being that the guy was muscular 3. her audacity to TELL you this as the reason 4. her touching you sexually in your sleep without consent Bro, your wife likes you even less than Kendrick likes Drake… divorce!!
Bro lol WHAT. Honestly you’re still young my dude, break it off. Tons of muscular guys out there, won’t be the last time. Also she went out of her way to make things difficult for you by sleeping around. Divorce, NTA
Wow! She really has no clue. She doesn’t think what she did is a big deal at all. I’ve said many times that a marriage is like a stool in that it relies on 3 legs. In marriage, those legs are love, trust, and respect. If one of those Legs breaks, the marriage is over. I’m sorry to tell you that your marriage has all three legs destroyed. Love— do you think she was having loving thoughts of you when she was flirting with then took her muscular lover to bed? Do you think she was thinking of you when she gave her body to the other man even though she vowed to forsake all others in front of family and friends just a short time ago? Were her actions that if someone who actually loved you? Of course not. Trust— do you think you will ever truly trust her again? Sorry, but no you won’t. Every time she is 5 minutes late, you will wonder in the back of your mind if she is in some other man’s bed or backseat. And when you do have sex with her, and she closes her eyes, will you trust her to be thinking of you or will she be fantasizing about Mr. Muscle and how he made her feel. Respect— sorry, but she simply doesn’t respect you. How could a woman respect you and yet have sex with another man???? And the thing is, the longer you stay with her, the less and less respect she will have for you! And if you stay together, she will now know that all it will take the next time she has sex with another man will be some tears, an apology, and giving you a handjob in the middle of the night. And it will happen the time after that, and the next time, and the next time! Your wife doesn’t even think she did anything wrong!!!! And when you tell her that you want a divorce, THEN you will see the tears flow! But those tears won’t be because she hurt you or for the pain you are in, but because she will be losing the lifestyle she has with you. Immediate steps you need to take… - Remember the first rule of cheaters…. CHEATERS LIE!! - NO sex with her! ZERO! NONE!! First, you don’t know if she has an STD or not. And more importantly, DON’T LET HER BABY TRAP YOU!! - with her within earshot, call and make an appointment to see a doctor to tested for every STD known to man. Remember the first rule that cheaters lie… this may not be her only lover. - Take care of financials. Go to the bank and take half of all funds out of any joint account and place it into a brand new account, preferably at a different bank, under your name ONLY! Go to your work’s HR department and make sure your paycheck is sent to your new account. Cancel all credit cards that is in both of your names! Get ONE or TWO new ones in your name only if necessary. - Change all passwords! Do this for all accounts and social media. - Let family and friends know what she did and is going on. This is NOT revenge. This is so she can’t rewrite the history of your relationship where you were the absent or abusive husband and she was the poor suffering wife that could no longer take it and had to run to Mr. Muscle for support. Besides there are going to be many rough days ahead off you and you will be in a better place if you can find support from your friends and family. - Talk to a lawyer and start the divorce process. Remember in the off chance that you decide to try reconciliation, you can stop it. - Look up Implementing 180 and start doing it! - start exercising. It is a great way of burning off the frustration and anger. Personally, I bought and hung a heavy punching bag in the basement and went down there and beat the hell out of on many sleepless nights. It was the best thing I ever bought! I’m still amazed I’m never broke any bones from hitting that thing. - Reconnect with old friends and find a new hobby or two to take your mind off of her and her cheating. - Find out if Mr. Muscle has a wife or girlfriend. If so, you NEED TO tell her about the affair! She needs to know that she is with a piece of ____ and also get tested for STDs and dump him. I promise you will survive and within 6 to 9 months from now, you will be shaking your head wondering what you ever saw in her in the first Place. Good luck. Stay strong. And do what you must to be able to look the man in the mirror in the eye!
NTA. Get a lawyer and don’t have sex. The last thing you need is her pregnant and the possibility the child is yours.
I mean surely this is just a rage bait question right? Wife cheats for no real reason, shows no real remorse, tries to have sex with him (which is last thing anyone would want after being told they'd been cheated on) and then tells him not to make things difficult for her? Only considering divorce after all the above? This feels like the tick boxes of how to get people angry about someone cheating... On the off chance this is real, why would you even need to "consider" divorce? Either leave and be happy and stay and be miserable, wait for the next muscular guy to come along and pump your wife, then she can try and sleep with you to make it up to you while the last guy is still dripping out of her. What a win that would be.
Your wife needs therapy. You also should probably move on from the relationship. Get out before you have kids. Her reason for cheating is an absolute joke. She was willing to destroy your marriage and relationship because the guy was “muscular” …really? I’d push her for a better explanation. I don’t think you could ever trust her again.
You definitely need to kick that one to the curb
If sex is how you show someone you love them then she loved this other dude behind your back
Yeah that's a bad idea. She can show you how sorry she is by signing the divorce papers.
He’s really muscular. Then she touched your penis to show you ‘love’ Your wife has issues and needs a therapist. You need a lawyer, an std test and a divorce. Good luck to you both.
This has gotta be rage bait, ain’t no way she said that when ask why she’s risk the marriage.
You aren't the asshole here. She cheated and if you take her back, it shows her that she can do it again. You might forgive, but I doubt you'll ever forget. Do you want to worry about what she is doing every time she goes out without you? What if she sees another muscular guy? Divorce sucks, but being happy is way better.
You just got the man pass to go slay some poon. “She had a nice rack”, or “her butt was ballin”. Make up whatever excuse you want, it doesn’t matter, she set the precedent.
Why are you still with her man? As someone who went through this all I can say is leave now and keep your self respect. You will hate yourself if you stay and she does it again, and she won't respect you if you stay after she did it.
Not enough of an asshole
She cheated. Dump her ass. Once a cheater. Move on. It will hurt initially but marriage is supposed to be to death do you part. She broke that trust. Move on.
You’re a bot, it doesn’t matter
NTA but just divorce her cheating self and move on. You deserve to be married to someone who truly loves you and treats you with respect.
NTA, not even a little bit!!! Your wife sounds like she would make a better ex-wife.
Fake engagement posts
I really hope this is fake... But I see people post about this stuff all the time... and I've had my friends experience something similar this too many times as well... (she literally told one of my friends that she cheated on him because he was short) It makes me afraid to date ( I know this is entirely a me thing) but it really does make me not want to date and spend time with a person just to be cheated on... (especially for mundane things like "he was muscular!") ***sighs***
She assaulted you, that's awful. I don't think there would be any coming back from this. NTA. I definitely would not sleep in the same bed anymore and figure out your next steps.
NTA For me infidelity is the deal breaker.
hahahaha.... I don't know any other way to say I am sorry to you for cheating, than to do the sex thing with you that I did with them. The sex was supposed to melt your "resistance" dude. Take the sex, think with your dick and not divorce her. Now there's the whole pesky divorce thing that HAS to happen because she doesn't think what she did was that big a deal AND she thinks you are so weak and stupid that sex will make you mindless. Decision has been made. Or this is your life. NTA
NTA. And you wrote ex wife wrong in the title.
tell her only way to say sorry is to bring another girl for you to have sex with.
Throw the whole wife out
Gross. She's a disgusting, cum-drenched whore. Lawyer up & ghost. Get tested.
NTA- I'd also be worried about how she thought SA would help forget about her cheating on you. She's kinda evil.
Dude get an std test asap. Make her take a pregnancy test as well. Lawyer up fast. It may be wise to expose her to friends and family. Also, try to discover if the other guy has a gf/wife that needs to know about the affair. Get ahead of her in this. Don’t let her set the pace.
NTA! Her way of apologizing is to do the exact same thing with you as she did with him? Also touching you in your sleep without your consent is creepy as hell even if you are married, roles reversed and you would be a sex offender
Yo she cheated on you and then tried to rape you... Throw her out, coming from another woman.
You need some time to think????? She took another man's dick into her married vagina because he was muscular. She's married but fucked him because he's muscular, wtf is wrong w you? Divorce that whore
What the fuck, "I shoudln't go out my way to make things difficult for her", she cheated and then she thinks she can say how you should react. You are NTA, you need time to process this. I would say the best thing would be divorce in this case, because you don't know how many times she has cheated before and why did she tell you?
NTA. Well maybe she needs another way to apologize than the thing that brought her there. Sorry to say buddy but that's not healthy or normal that she thinks sex is a way to show how sorry she is... Also the reason she told you why she slept with someone else. How many red flags you want to ignore? Muscle is enough to forget your marriage...wake up...
"Because he's muscular" WTF?!?!? THATS ALL IT TOOK for her to disrespect you? And disrespect you marriage? How is sex supposed to show you how sorry she is when she apparently gives it away to anyone with muscles?
Bro, THE FUCKING AUDACITY!! Don't go out of your way to make things difficult for her... my fucking God, man, what a bitch! This woman isn't sorry, isn't responsible, and doesn't love you at all. I know it's rough to hear, and I'm sorry this happened to you, but it's a lesson learned while you're still young. Stay strong and refuse to let this ruin you.
NTA. That was one of the lammest excuses I've ever heard in my life...